…because you were the lie that had been perpetuated by my complex lonely soul. I had pinwheeled into your universe by a pull beyond my control and coalesced with your natural life. You’re brighter than you let on, and you conceal it only to further exacerbate an already out of control freefall. I thought it was real… because I thought I mattered.
…because there’s nothing left but bitter words and burnt out flecks of light. Everything that was in me that was splayed out across a table for your fucking inspection, is now crumbling from your diseased fingertips, lightly tracing my swollen lips, as I drift beyond sleep and fade out of this hole. There is no tightly wrapped gift concealed beneath the tree… no… there is fucking nothing left of me.
…because I was never fucking good enough to begin with, yet you wouldn’t fucking let me run away! You crawled beside me and pleaded for the last bit of me I fucking had left. Creeped and crawled beneath my skin, buying trust with my soul as the goddamn currency. It was all I had left… ALL I FUCKING HAD!!!
…because it was everything to me.